It is possible Warners will license you a few Casablanca clips. It’s also possible I will win the Pulitzer Prize for this blog. Both are equally likely, but my money is on the Pulitzer. “It would take a miracle to get you [a clip] of Casablanca, and [Warners has] outlawed miracles.” But just because something is impossible doesn’t mean it’s impossible to try to get it. Call Warners’ clip licensing run-around hotline at (818) 954-2298 (please don’t mention my name — very important). While at it, double down and buy a lottery ticket.

Most kidding aside, if you request a very limited license, you might have a chance. For example, if you limit the license to only non-commercial uses of your short, such as festival screenings (theatrical and if you’re lucky online), DVD submissions to show your work, etc., but no DVDs for sale, no TV, no paid screenings, it will make it less impossible. Of course, a limited license like this will limit what you can do with the short, which is the nature of a limited license.

I must admit your “out of focus shot of the film playing in the background” idea impressed me, comically, not legally. Maybe do it out of focus, upside down, backwards, with bright green tint? Copyright law doesn’t rely on the quality of the lens or picture. A fuzzy copy of something is still a copy.

And having actors rerecord the lines, imitating the voice of Bogart and Bergman, doesn’t help you get around copyright law, either. If rerecording the lines helped, then you could record the entire movie — that’s a remake, for which you’d need a license. But maybe I spoke too soon. If you rerecord Bogart to sound like Kobayashi, Mr. Söze’s entertainment lawyer, and Bergman to sound like Rosie O’Donnell, you’d have yourself a little parody, and that may possibly get you around having to license the rights. Factoid: Kobayashi is not-so-loosely based on yours truly. “One cannot be betrayed if one has no people” is one of the mottos on my business card and the ringtone on my cell.

There is another possibility. You might look into the Casablanca music. It might be easier to license some of the recognizable music and have it play over a generic black and white movie in the background. The impression would be the couple is watching Casablanca, but you’re not using any actual Casablanca footage, just music. And especially if you’re willing to rerecord the music, getting just a sync license (vs. sync and master) should be much easier.

If none of this works, it would be funnier if your couple were on a date to see Catwoman. I know I don’t know if your short is even a comedy, and I know you’re not asking me for my creative suggestions, but they’re just as good as my legal ones.

This blog was originally published as part of Legal Ease, Film Independent’s weekly column on legal matters pertaining to the entertainment industry. To see other LEGAL EASE columns please click here.