Stefanie J. Lipson

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In celebration of Tax Day today, we here at Law Law Land offer tribute to our favorite celebrity/IRS run-ins.  Now, lest you think this is just another list airing dirty celebrity tax laundry, think again.  This is a classy publication, as you well know, so if you’re looking for dirt on which celebrities owe what, look elsewhere. . . like here, or here, or here.  Instead, on this national day of tax collection, Law Law Land is pleased recognize five (or more) of our favorite celebrity tax stories of all time… so far.

Honorable Mention:  Timothy Geithner

In our Honorable Mention category of “Really, Are You Kidding Me?,” we recognize former Treasury Secretary (i.e., head of the U.S. Treasury, the folks you make that tax check out to) Timothy Geithner, who underpaid his personal federal income taxes from 2001 to 2004 by failing to report and pay social security and self-employment tax on income received from the International Monetary Fund.  Mr. Former Secretary subsequently amended his returns since he “should have been more careful.”  We imagine he regretted his “unintentional” decision not to report that income when appearing before the Senate Finance Committee during his confirmation hearings to control the United States’ piggy bank.

Honorable Mention:  Nick Diaz

In our Honorable Mention category of “How Dumb Can You Be?,” the award goes to MMA fighter Nick Diaz, who recently announced during a post-match press conference that he has “never paid taxes in his life” and “is probably going to jail.”  Well, if Nick had only read about some of the other people on this list, then he definitely would have seen that coming! Continue reading the full story . . . »

Ken Basin

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[In honor of Super Bowl XLVII — because everyone knows that Roman numerals make everything very distinguished and significant — we're bringing back one of our most-read, and most personally-favored posts.  Enjoy your SUPER BOWL PARTY, everyone.]

Unless you live here, I’m assuming you’re aware of a little football game taking place this weekend between the San Francisco 49ers and the Baltimore Ravens.  (And maybe, just maybe, you might have heard something — but probably nothing original — about that whole Harbowl storyline.  Well here’s a little-known wrinkle about it.)

I’m as excited as anyone for the game, which is why, this Sunday, I might try to find a local bar hosting a Super Bowl party. But I’ll probably be out of luck, unless I’m willing to go to a “Big Game” party instead. And if I’m feeling spendthrift — the always-confusing word that sounds like “thrifty” but actually means “profligate” — I might try to pick up a new flat-screen TV at a Super Bowl sale. But unless I’m willing to settle for one of those ubiquitous “Big Game” sales, I’ll probably be forced to stick with what I’ve got.

Every year, while every sports yak in America is obsessing over Super Bowl scouting reports, every business in America is trying to capitalize on the game. But most of them aren’t using the words “Super Bowl” to do so, and the reason is fairly obvious: the phrase “Super Bowl” is trademarked by the NFL, which is famously protective of its intellectual property. Moreover, the privilege of using the phrase “Super Bowl” in advertising is one of the valuable rights bestowed by the NFL upon its advertisers and promotional partners — which gives the NFL extra incentive to keep freeloaders from poaching the phrase (thereby diminishing its value to potential paying promotional partners).

But what if the NFL is wrong? What if I really could check out the Super Bowl party at my favorite watering hole without them being subjected to the threat of legal doom?

Guess what, folks: I can. Continue reading the full story . . . »

Jesse Saivar

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So last week, I was on my 173^rd consecutive hour of consuming blog articles, news stories, tweets, posts, video interviews, transcripts of interviews, analyses of transcripts of interviews, and opinions on the analyses of transcripts of interviews about Manti Te’o and his imaginary dead girlfriend, when I noticed that something else critical happened in the world of sports.  OMG OMG OMG!  Did you hear that Colin Kaepernick, NFC champion quarterback of the San Francisco 49ers and flat-billed hat enthusiast, recently “trademarked” his signature, tattooed-biceps-kissing touchdown celebration now known as “Kaepernicking?”

Wait, WHAT?!  Does this mean that when I finish this blog, Colin is telling me I can’t celebrate by jumping up from my desk and kissing my beautiful biceps?  Have you seen my biceps?  It’s hard for me to look down at them and not kiss them!  It’s like I have Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Chastain staring up at me from each bicep, lips pursed, like some insane Popeye fever dream.

In my panic, I poured through the incomprehensibly large number of stories about this.  But then I had a thought.  No, not “What am I doing with my life?”  No, not even “What is everyone at ESPN doing with their lives?”  No, my thought was “Wait wait… I’m a lawyer, damn it!  I actually know what all of this means!  These guys don’t!” Continue reading the full story . . . »

Dan Nabel

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Seattle sports fans recently rejoiced when the Maloof family announced that they have (finally) agreed to sell their stake in the Sacramento Kings to a Seattle-based investment group that (spoiler alert) intends to move the team back to the Emerald City.  Considering how well the former Seattle SuperSonics are doing as the new OKC Thunder, coupled with the fact that the Seahawks recently blew what could have been the most amazing comeback in recent memory, who could possibly deny Seattle’s sports fans this fantastic opportunity?

For starters, there are the Sacramento Kings’ fans, who fully appreciate the irony of Seattle trying to poach an existing team while still bemoaning the fact that their Sonics team got poached by Oklahoma City.  Rest assured that Kings fans will stop at nothing to keep the team in “Cowbell Kingdom,” if for no other reason than to continue persisting in their ridiculous fantasy that a “rivalry” exists between the Kings and the Lakers.  (Of course, what’s really going on is an all-too-obvious ploy to support the struggling cowbell industry, which the rest of America — except for maybe The Bruce Dickinson — will just never understand).  Leading the Cowbell Kingdom movement is former Phoenix Suns superstar and now-mayor of Sacramento, Kevin Johnson, who not only has a political science degree from U.C. Berkley, but also blew my 12-year-old mind back in 1994 when he posterized Hakeem Olajuwon.

Just one day after this week’s announcement of the sale, mayor KJ warned Seattle fans:  “Don’t celebrate too early.”  Because if KJ gets his way, the Kings will be staying in Sacramento (and the cowbell industry will be saved).  Such a result would not only devastate the hopes and dreams of Seattle NBA fans, but would also totally obviate all of the hypothetical legal stuff I may or may not eventually get around to discussing later in this article. Continue reading the full story . . . »

Dan Nabel

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My wife is very excited about tonight’s Laker game.  Not because she is a Laker fan.  Indeed, any actual Laker fan (like me) knows that now is a decidedly bad time to be a Laker fan.  True, during the last off-season we acquired Superman a/k/a D12 a/k/a Dwight Howard, and two-time MVP Steve Nash season.  True, we still have the Black Mamba.  And yes, we still have (at least for the moment) Pau Gasol.  We even replaced former-coach-of-the-year Mike Brown with different former-coach-of-the-year Mike D’Antoni as our new head coach (although it meant passing on other former-coach-of-the-year Phil Jackson).  So why are the Clippers the L.A. basketball team going on franchise winning streaks, while the Lakers are a sub .500 team?  Why does the classic and hilarious Onion video about a Staples’ Center collapse scenario which mercifully brings about an early end to a Clippers game now seem like it should only apply to the Lakers?

Whatever the reason, my wife couldn’t care less.  Like I said, she’s not a Laker fan — she’s a Steve Nash fan.  It’s so bad, in fact, that she won’t even watch the game when Steve Nash is not on the floor.  She’ll just pick up her iPhone and look at cute animal pictures or surf Pinterest.com for whatever it is that people do on Pinterest.com.  Maybe looking for pictures of Steve Nash?  In short, she completely loses interest.  So I can understand her paranoia about whether Steve Nash will suit up tonight (especially given his recent trouble with injuries).

But would my wife and I ever sue the Lakers for a refund if they decided to bench Steve Nash?  Of course not.  It’s not like we live in Miami!

Because these days, people apparently do that kind of thing in Miami… Continue reading the full story . . . »

Ken Basin

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This time last year, Law Law Land joined the hackneyed proud tradition of legal blogs offering year-end lists of cases to watch in the coming year (though in our defense, we did try to mix it up by reviewing totally absurd cases as well as totally important cases).  But “year in review” and “year to come” are cultural clichés that never held much appeal to me.  “Where are they now?” on the other hand?  That’s more my speed.  (Maybe that’s why I always adored the last five minutes of every episode of VH1’s Behind the Music, where the program would show the artist in their current, everyday life and tease the inevitable “impending comeback.”)  So what has become of those five big cases we told you to watch this year?  And did we pick good ones or not?  (Preview:  Yes, we did.  Oh shush, I don’t care if we’re biased.) Continue reading the full story . . . »